tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-588538900633468212024-02-20T16:39:35.701-06:00Transformational CommunicationEngage | Inspire | TransformAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.comBlogger181125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-19757395158054624472018-02-25T13:32:00.002-06:002018-02-25T13:32:24.548-06:00Single-Tasking: Antidote to Multi-Tasking<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYh0Bgz9VFwQmwUp6Ll6YiiSzAxomwPd4n6kNYXL6suo9IZb3tcKLhjSnJ09KVv8Svgu7VoI18ube3gC4yC-yDKXUfZLvr4dtQVsPSS19_GIbrMSj7GJk3G4c-Cn6yTXGXHrbIjhZjSw/s1600/Focus+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1172" data-original-width="1600" height="146" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYh0Bgz9VFwQmwUp6Ll6YiiSzAxomwPd4n6kNYXL6suo9IZb3tcKLhjSnJ09KVv8Svgu7VoI18ube3gC4yC-yDKXUfZLvr4dtQVsPSS19_GIbrMSj7GJk3G4c-Cn6yTXGXHrbIjhZjSw/s200/Focus+Image.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="margin: 0px;">by Janet M. Shlaes,
PhD</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
We live in a world of multiple simultaneous demands for our
attention. The concept of “multi-tasking” was created in order to turn our
constant state of agitation into the pretense of a skill. Most likely, you’ve been
on both sides of the multi-tasking table, as participant and recipient. Neither
side feels particularly satisfying. The undesirable impact of multi-tasking is
that you are never fully present to anything or anyone. Although multi-tasking
provides the “illusion” of productivity, the cost in terms of stress level and relationships
is exceptionally high. </div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
In service of experimentation and moving outside of my
comfort zone, I embarked on the mission of “single-tasking” for one week. I
discovered that breaking my multi-tasking habit was a lot more challenging than
anticipated. Single-tasking required an extremely high level of self- and other-awareness,
along with the ability to be fully present to whatever I was doing at any
moment in time. It meant that when I was reading, I was just reading; when I
was talking on the phone, I was just on the phone and wasn’t scanning my email,
making coffee, reading reports or writing; when I was listening to music, I was
just listening to music; when I was with someone, I was fully present to what
he / she was saying and not going over a mental “to-do list.” Single-tasking
also meant that I increased my awareness regarding when I wasn’t present in the
moment and the potential impact of this state on others; it also meant intentionally
choosing to refocus on whatever was happening in that particular moment.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span></div>
<br />
My discoveries resulting from my single-tasking experiment
were powerful. Time seemed to slow down and my senses intensified. I noticed
things that previously would have been beyond my conscious awareness: the radiance
of whatever was occurring in a particular moment; the sounds and patterns of
various types of music; the unique magnificence of the person I was speaking to;
the secrets revealed in my familiar urban landscape; the joy present in doing previously
insignificant household tasks. An added bonus was how quickly I was able to complete
my actual “to-do” list. <br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
I invite you to take on the challenge and gifts of single-tasking
and enjoy the experience of being fully present. You have everything to gain
and little, if anything, to lose.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b><span style="color: navy; font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 22pt; margin: 0px;">Janet</span></b></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><span style="color: blue;"></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-30278649729406421042018-02-18T14:00:00.000-06:002018-02-18T14:00:01.461-06:00Choose Wisely<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH6_coOnK3II2a3eX0wAE4qS3KuSc42FBBg2c-MLSlhyphenhyphen5FLBuT0wy7ASyU-b4GCjXT5jnHKdLGUSx1Ikp3irL3-wGcn2J7ZrggdaB0ayaKhyCOJgSpS7JHzfcxWmSBTmSQrBHPEmGsyw/s1600/Choosing+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="210" data-original-width="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH6_coOnK3II2a3eX0wAE4qS3KuSc42FBBg2c-MLSlhyphenhyphen5FLBuT0wy7ASyU-b4GCjXT5jnHKdLGUSx1Ikp3irL3-wGcn2J7ZrggdaB0ayaKhyCOJgSpS7JHzfcxWmSBTmSQrBHPEmGsyw/s1600/Choosing+Image.jpg" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
b<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">y Janet M. Shlaes, PhD</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Your current reality results from your prior choices. Every
day, you are faced with a myriad of choices, from comparatively “simple”
ones regarding self-expression, where to live and work, money and relationships,
to the more complex ones regarding ethics and morality. What many often fail to
realize is that seemingly simple choices turn out to be significant life
altering ones in the long-run. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">If you are like most individuals, many of your life choices
tend to be more reactive than proactive. Do you usually make decisions guided
by self-awareness, intention, values and principles? Or, do you often make “decisions
by default,” via not choosing anything or following the path of least
resistance? Not making a decision often releases unanticipated and often unwanted
outcomes. Most “decisions by default” result from fear, fear of the unknown,
what others will think or feel, or fear of undesired consequences.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Although it may initially seem easier to reactively
choose, you may wind up with someone else’s version of who you should be and
what you should do. Consciously choosing requires courage and faith – the courage
to mindfully act from your highest values and faith that things will work out
in the long-run. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Your current reality results from your prior choices. What
will you choose today? What future reality will you set into motion today? </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #1f3864; font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 22pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">For related posts, check out the following links:</span></div>
<span style="color: #4e2800; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/12/kindness.html"><span style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Kindness</span></span></a><span style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #4e2800; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; margin: 0px;"><div style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">
</div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/11/gratitude.html"><span style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Gratitude</span></span></a><span style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"></span></div>
<div style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">
</div>
</span>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><u></u><span style="color: #f48d1d;"></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-33983535693323953482018-02-11T13:13:00.000-06:002018-02-11T13:13:04.536-06:00Aligning your Values and Actions
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhra4jArzBBZVH2aBX6kvygO4TjROhdD-VFpuNoblPiKMQJmK2xHaEWtcDiBIbwVWziClm3EOLIJsZPfNCwHMEBsGdZa6GjIS0Z0KbTiU7MJjQKjJU8MAUofoj-JgPQAU0-u_O8tB7LQg/s1600/8_9_10_BridgeImage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="495" data-original-width="660" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhra4jArzBBZVH2aBX6kvygO4TjROhdD-VFpuNoblPiKMQJmK2xHaEWtcDiBIbwVWziClm3EOLIJsZPfNCwHMEBsGdZa6GjIS0Z0KbTiU7MJjQKjJU8MAUofoj-JgPQAU0-u_O8tB7LQg/s320/8_9_10_BridgeImage.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">by Janet M. Shlaes, PhD</span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">What do you profess to value and what do you actually value? </span>Lately, I’ve increasingly noticed the gap between
words and actions in myself and in others. This repeatedly shows up around the
gravitational pull of technology. Don’t get me wrong. I love the benefits of
technology, dearly treasure my technological gadgets and greatly appreciate
what technology does to enhance our work and increase our connection with
others. Unfortunately, there are costs attached to
always being virtually connected. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Connection via technology often provides the illusion
of relationship at the expense of authentic connection. I am increasingly disturbed
to see people sitting on a bench in an art museum or a playground focusing on
their email, texts, etc. rather than on the amazing work of art in front of
them or their miraculous offspring. I would imagine that if asked, each of
these individuals would talk about valuing art, beauty and the miracle of life.
I have also been guilty of these behaviors resulting from the seduction of
technology.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">What do you profess to value and what do you actually
value? Actions, rather than words, ultimately define how we move through the
world, who we are and what we truly value. We <span style="margin: 0px;">o</span>ften
choose actions that are not aligned with our stated values and our desired
identity. I invite you to step back on a regular basis to observe the alignment
of your words and actions with your core values. <span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>You have nothing to lose and everything to
gain.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #44546a; font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 22pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 16px;">
<span style="color: #4e2800; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;">For related posts,
check out the following links:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 7px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/03/should-could-accomplish.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px; text-decoration: none;">Should,
Could, Accomplish</span></a></div>
<div style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 7px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/03/thinking-small-for-big-results.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px; text-decoration: none;">Thinking
Small for Big Results</span></a></div>
<br />
<div style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-19356575440036910282017-10-16T06:31:00.001-05:002017-10-16T06:31:33.138-05:00Asking the Right Questions
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqU5jGHlP5XWSA_9kTcufA5XM4ELdvuBGd4tz7SG0aiQY7uNNkAuIj_r9SAchhQ4nnBWFGioIbmZ59Xo4h7pJiNhvXQB67EbIw81zUwsguvc5pkTbNPinFrAyeMRQyupBtgswLYE3KNg/s1600/8_9_10_QuestionMarkImage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="708" data-original-width="900" height="313" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqU5jGHlP5XWSA_9kTcufA5XM4ELdvuBGd4tz7SG0aiQY7uNNkAuIj_r9SAchhQ4nnBWFGioIbmZ59Xo4h7pJiNhvXQB67EbIw81zUwsguvc5pkTbNPinFrAyeMRQyupBtgswLYE3KNg/s400/8_9_10_QuestionMarkImage.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">Asking the Right Questions</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15pt; margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15pt; margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">by Janet M. Shlaes, PhD</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15pt; margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: 15pt; margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">The questions you ask determine your
reality and your results. What types of questions do you regularly ask? Do they
tend to get you the results that you truly want? The types of questions you
regularly ask determine your focus, the information you seek and take in, your
overall experience in the world and, most importantly, your results. Leaning to
ask the right questions is both a process and an evolutionary journey. Asking
questions with conscious intention can result in creativity and next level
results. This bold claim holds true across professional and personal
realms. A few of my favorite questions that lead to collaboration,
enthusiasm, creativity and results include, but are not limited to, the
following questions.</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="line-height: 15pt; margin: 0px;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">If anything were possible, what result
would we want to accomplish? </span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">This
type of question immediately puts us in a “visioning,” rather than a “problem
solving” state of mind. The question doesn’t ignore that problems exist; it
powerfully puts people in the space of what might be possible when everyone is
committed to the same outcome goal. I have personally found that this question
is highly effective in both the professional and personal realms and fully
aligns with the Appreciative Inquiry model (one of my favorite approaches to
creating). An added bonus is that problems, potential and imagined, tend to be
eliminated or solved with this approach.</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="line-height: 15pt; margin: 0px;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">What type of discussion would be the
best use of our time? Another version of this is “What type of conversation has
the best chance of getting us what we want?” </span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">These
types of questions are useful when a conversation progresses into a
conversation of who is right or wrong or a “blaming” conversation. Asking these
questions or some other version of them empowers participants to step back and
reboot the conversation to one that has a higher probability of moving the
project and/or the relationship forward.</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="line-height: 15pt; margin: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 13pt; margin: 0px;">The questions you ask determine your
reality and your results. What types of questions do you regularly ask? What
types of results do you want to achieve?</span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">For addition insights
and observations, I invite you to check out the following posts:</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"></span></div>
<br />
<div style="background: white;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/04/defining-moments.html"><span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue;">Defining
Moments</span></span></a><span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; margin: 0px;"></span></div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/optimal-performance-fundamentals_25.html"><span lang="EN" style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Optimal
Performance Fundamentals</span></span></a></span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/12/making-difference.html"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Making
a Difference</span></span></a></span><br />
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-10013383943906630612017-08-28T06:58:00.000-05:002017-08-28T06:58:27.057-05:00Empty Space: The Gateway to Creativity and PresenceWritten by Janet Shlaes, PhD<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcTfPvzKbRAhZLfcM38ZY1Y25q-f3w3PTnBRNR_QGW5b6gPdpKqSjkLUMgz_Wsyjli47zTASAOKSlF9PcXLl_iqhLZgpRhNeD4Zcpj1gJBMq5OknSbDY7TBX6xMks_QHypikx5GMLzaQ/s1600/Balancing+Stones+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1440" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcTfPvzKbRAhZLfcM38ZY1Y25q-f3w3PTnBRNR_QGW5b6gPdpKqSjkLUMgz_Wsyjli47zTASAOKSlF9PcXLl_iqhLZgpRhNeD4Zcpj1gJBMq5OknSbDY7TBX6xMks_QHypikx5GMLzaQ/s320/Balancing+Stones+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
“Creativity involves breaking out of established patterns in order to look at things in a different way.” ~ Edward de Bono<br />
<br />
What do you do when faced with the reality of empty space, dedicated time without external distractions? If you’re like most people, truly empty space might leave you feeling a bit edgy, wondering what you might be missing. What you might not fully realize is that this selfsame empty space is essential to the creative process. The most powerful insights and inspired musings take place in the empty spaces where we are not faced with a myriad of external diversions. <br />
<br />
Please be assured that I am not suggesting that we give up any of the gifts of technology, beauty, nature and relationships. What I am suggesting is that when you intentionally incorporate empty space into your day, you will ultimately be more fully present to every aspect of your life. Commit to incorporating a bit of empty space into each day and just notice what it feels like. Start small, a mere five minutes to begin with and expand your empty space over time. Some possibilities include:<br />
<br />
1. Walking to your next destination without looking at or using your smartphone,<br />
<br />
2. Setting aside dedicated time each day to just think about whatever comes to mind,<br />
<br />
3. Journaling about whatever comes to mind in the moment,<br />
<br />
4. Formally scheduling empty space time in your calendar.<br />
<br />
What are some gifts that might wait for you via incorporating some empty space into your life?<br />
<br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20pt; margin: 0px;">Janet</span></b><br />
<br />
For addition insights and observations, check out the following posts:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/06/if-youre-asking-question-day-5.html" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank"><u>If You're Asking the Question</u></a><br />
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/10/quitting.html" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank"><u>Quitting</u></a><br />
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2012/01/joy-of-single-tasking.html" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank"><u>Joy of Single Tasking</u></a><br />
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-6547911348394820642017-08-12T07:18:00.001-05:002017-08-12T07:19:03.578-05:00Beginner's Mind Benefits<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhu2PD7Z17qbpq9kSrbWRO0j2kiTWAQr8I308rxjN2U9BwC2nSTe1Vzo3oIGMRj3N_mvYCEblkgiPc3hPV5Ez3yYmtry_yPEi-SZG7ibtMgNfQHPzh3nk23D6mBmgIDethi88ELJ0S4Rg/s1600/Learning+Brain+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1132" data-original-width="1600" height="226" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhu2PD7Z17qbpq9kSrbWRO0j2kiTWAQr8I308rxjN2U9BwC2nSTe1Vzo3oIGMRj3N_mvYCEblkgiPc3hPV5Ez3yYmtry_yPEi-SZG7ibtMgNfQHPzh3nk23D6mBmgIDethi88ELJ0S4Rg/s320/Learning+Brain+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span lang="EN" style="margin: 0px;">Written by Janet Shlaes, PhD</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span lang="EN" style="margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<span lang="EN" style="margin: 0px;">Have you ever had the experience
of arriving at your destination oblivious to what transpired between the time you
left and the time you arrived? Perhaps you were focused on some unsolved
problem, a prior interpersonal exchange or maybe you were just too tired to
focus your attention on your surroundings. If this is your usual experience,
you’re not alone. It’s common to move through your daily routine unmindful of the
potential gifts in your seemingly ordinary surroundings.</span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN" style="margin: 0px;">I offer you an alternative to
this unaware state of mind – embodying a Beginner’s Mind way of moving through
the world. Beginner's Mind embodies the qualities of openness, enthusiasm,
creativity, optimism and awe. Young children exemplify the Beginner’s Mindset,
seeing and experiencing their world through freshness and wonder. Through
Beginner's Mind, one is able to take in what is present in the moment. Things
that adults characteristically ignore or take for granted become opportunities
for curiosity, engagement and wonder. Beginner’s Mind empowers you to co-exist in
the familiar from multiple perspectives - seeing beyond the surface to
experience the formerly ordinary as extraordinary. </span><br />
<span lang="EN" style="margin: 0px;"><br /></span>
<br />
<span lang="EN" style="margin: 0px;">Where in your life could you
benefit from embodying a Beginner’s Mindset? I invite you to try this out for a
week or two or three and notice the shift in the quality of your experience in
the world.</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b><span lang="EN" style="color: navy; font-family: "bradley hand itc"; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-size: large;">Janet</span></span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<span style="margin: 0px;">For
addition insights and observations, I invite you to check out the following
posts:</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2011/11/reality-tv-wisdom.html"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue;">Reality TV Wisdom</span></span></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/07/agendas-yours-mine-and-ours-day-13.html"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue;">Agendas - Yours, Mine and
Ours</span></span></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/07/getting-fluffy-day-15.html"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue;">Getting Fluffy</span></span></a><span style="margin: 0px;"></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-67587090320716557942017-08-04T06:32:00.001-05:002017-08-04T06:32:31.194-05:00Forgiveness and Emotional Intelligence
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpp1CgbvCjDxbT0EAzCq4xZvEhJKwYIXlQeI9WnTGIB8-R6aabHjjhXil55hsCVnZ796b1ziH6NgZvJf_oIlKS2QKUR40L2g-CAVdqBZgqMekPJPe4HOcaU0nBJS66eWPet_tYTU315g/s1600/WindPower.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="200" data-original-width="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpp1CgbvCjDxbT0EAzCq4xZvEhJKwYIXlQeI9WnTGIB8-R6aabHjjhXil55hsCVnZ796b1ziH6NgZvJf_oIlKS2QKUR40L2g-CAVdqBZgqMekPJPe4HOcaU0nBJS66eWPet_tYTU315g/s1600/WindPower.jpg" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
by Janet Shlaes, PhD</div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Choosing forgiveness embodies the essence of Emotional
Intelligence (EQ). It requires self-, other- and social-awareness, as well as
the capacity to move beyond one’s present emotions to a more expansive state. Forgiveness,
although often quite challenging, is a gift that you give to yourself - a gift
that momentarily releases you from the past. The act of forgiveness requires
letting go of something – a sense of injustice, disappointment, rage, perspective,
desire, expectation, vision and/or hope. Forgiveness requires moving beyond
what should have been to a place of coexisting with what occurred. This does
not in any way suggest that you should agree with, condone or appreciate the action
or situation that calls for your forgiveness, especially when faced with objectively
dreadful situations that are out of your control and understanding.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Forgiveness is about taking back your power. The biggest
misconception regarding forgiveness is that it’s a one-time endeavor – you simply
forgive and the offending injustice is over. Quite the contrary. Forgiveness is
an ongoing endeavor. You choose to engage in the act of forgiveness when the
emotional charge from a past wrong invades your current reality. Unless you intentionally
choose to forgive and momentarily let go of the past, your precious life force
will be utilized in keeping the past alive. <span style="margin: 0px;"> </span>Forgiveness is about freedom, focusing on what
truly matters and stepping into the energy of courage and strength. According
the Gandhi, “Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria",serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Would you rather be right or happy? Forgiveness is about
choosing to be happy. What will you choose?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 22pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: 18pt; margin: 0px 0px 30px;">
<span style="font-family: "Cambria",serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;">For additional commentaries to ponder, I invite you
to browse the following links:</span></div>
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/optimal-performance-fundamentals_25.html" target="_blank"><span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px; text-decoration: none;">Optimal Performance Fundamentals</span></a><br />
<span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"><br /></span>
<div style="line-height: 18pt; margin: 0px 0px 30px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/10/courage-revisited.html" target="_blank"><span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px; text-decoration: none;">Courage Revisited</span></a><span lang="EN" style="color: #4d4f51; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"> </span></div>
<div style="line-height: 18pt; margin: 0px 0px 30px;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #4d4f51; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"></span><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/04/defining-moments.html" target="_blank"><span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px; text-decoration: none;">Defining Moments</span></a><span lang="EN" style="color: #4d4f51; font-family: "Helvetica",sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"></span></div>
<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-672323757390538122017-03-10T08:26:00.000-06:002017-03-10T08:26:40.425-06:00The Road to Happiness: Three Essential Skills <div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBiRYp7NzJym3y8zmY0C3AyGy3zBXnRDTyPTRPE9INZFW_6GFUeFvzDZNsaZVpODAE5hrDDNzchSwLOoqLWfR3zplJsrFv4gOEsDXageUQXZOekN9xjpkNRlWUzFpHxkTMyiCyjYEdpA/s1600/Road+to+Success+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="275" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBiRYp7NzJym3y8zmY0C3AyGy3zBXnRDTyPTRPE9INZFW_6GFUeFvzDZNsaZVpODAE5hrDDNzchSwLOoqLWfR3zplJsrFv4gOEsDXageUQXZOekN9xjpkNRlWUzFpHxkTMyiCyjYEdpA/s320/Road+to+Success+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 14pt; margin: 0px;">The
Road to Happiness: Three Essential Skills </span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 14pt; margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 14pt; margin: 0px;">by Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;">People
who tend to be happy live intentionally with regard to three core happiness
skills. They understand that happiness is a choice, rather than a birthright
and are committed to practicing these skills on a daily basis. They know
exactly what they want, what constitutes their unique version of happiness and are
proactive in their happiness journey. Happy people appreciate that happiness is
a daily endeavor, rather than a absolute destination. Employing the three
essential happiness skills detailed below can empower you to live a life of
purpose, direction, passion and authentic happiness.</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<b><span lang="EN" style="font-size: 14pt; margin: 0px;">Self-awareness: </span></b></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px 0px 0px 24px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;">What makes you happy? On the surface, this seems like a simple question,
however, getting to the heart of this question can be quite challenging for
most. Why? Getting to the core of what makes you happy requires moving beyond
externally generated messages regarding the “shoulds” of happiness and moving
to a deeper level of awareness. Authentically answering this question requires
honesty, courage and vulnerability. Your answer will greatly inform you about
your deepest values, needs and motivators. It may also require letting go of
people, possessions and circumstances that don’t align with your unique happiness
narrative.</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<b><span lang="EN" style="font-size: 14pt; margin: 0px;">Commitment:</span></b></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;">What are you willing to commit to as a means to bringing more happiness
into your life? Once you have a working knowledge of your particular version of
happiness, commitment enters the picture. Being fully committed to doing
whatever it takes to create a fulfilling values-based life provides the requisite
motivation and sustenance to move through any challenges that present on your
journey. Commitment is rarely a one-time act; it requires returning to the
primary question of what makes you happy and periodically reconnecting with
your commitment to living a life of meaning and passion.</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<b><span lang="EN" style="font-size: 14pt; margin: 0px;">Self-care:</span></b></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;">The skill of self-care is often the most difficult one to embrace; for
some it feels selfish to focus on self-care when they have others to think of.
Consider, however, the familiar instructions on airplanes where we are asked to
put on our own oxygen mask and then take care of our loved ones. What if your
happiness directly served to enhance the lives of those you care about? Your level of happiness positively
impacts your relationships on a personal and professional basis. I’m not
suggesting a life of pure self-focus at the expense of others, however, a lack
of self-care will not serve anyone. Self-care is not a one size fits all feat.
For some, self-care may include a healthy lifestyle via exercise or diet. For others
it may involve hobbies, socializing, being in nature, reading, etc. What
matters is that your approach to self-care provides positive benefits to you
and others in your personal and professional lives. </span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;">Happiness is a choice and a life-long endeavor requiring self-awareness,
commitment to doing whatever it takes and intentionality with regard to
self-care. What is your unique version of happiness? What are you willing to do
to bring more happiness into your life?</span></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<b><span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20pt; margin: 0px;">Janet </span></b></div>
<div style="line-height: 15.75pt; margin: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-size: large;">For
addition insights and observations, check out the following posts:</span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/06/if-youre-asking-question-day-5.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri; font-size: large;">If
You're Asking the Question</span></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/are-your-smart-goals-smart-enough.html"><span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">Are
Your SMART Goals Smart Enough?</span></a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/10/quitting.html"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri; font-size: large;">Quitting</span></span></a></span></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-30156494745485274802017-01-04T13:15:00.000-06:002017-01-04T13:15:10.412-06:00Expectations and Next Level Results<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWVp2eyDgsINb1VDbhLxr1Y-XDGpvL4VaR8YvNDJHgfyaI_-Ids-F1oEETaRObqoSXslRAU8H2gD8AyVGJKxQrb_TWGl7eY-de-8KhVk-eCQJSjN-iD68I9gQ_KXmlE6QBmDLC2smv_w/s1600/WindPower.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWVp2eyDgsINb1VDbhLxr1Y-XDGpvL4VaR8YvNDJHgfyaI_-Ids-F1oEETaRObqoSXslRAU8H2gD8AyVGJKxQrb_TWGl7eY-de-8KhVk-eCQJSjN-iD68I9gQ_KXmlE6QBmDLC2smv_w/s320/WindPower.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">by Janet M.
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">“Checking the results of a decision against its
expectations shows executives what their strengths are, where they need to
improve, and where they lack knowledge or information.” </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">~ Peter Drucker<br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
<br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
</span></div>
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Our expectations provide us with two major functions:
the generation of aspirational goals and comparison check points to guide us toward accomplishing these goals. Expectations,
when used in a visionary strategic manner, ultimately serve to expand your
competence and accelerate your accomplishment of targeted goals. The source of
your expectations is critical with regard to using them as a guide and
motivator. Externally generated expectations, when not aligned with your core
values, can serve to elicit resentment and self/other-sabotage. Internally
generated expectations that align with your core-values, tend to result in bold visions and the setting of personally meaningful goals. These goals are then easily
translated into realistic ambitious action steps that elegantly lead to your
desired vision. An essential aspect of internally generated expectations
is the creation of natural "resting places" for evaluating your
progress. As detailed in the Peter Drucker quote
above, these evaluation moments provide you with essential information regarding
adjusting your actions steps, skills and perhaps your entire process.</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">What personal expectations will you commit to
strategically acting on in 2017? Imagine the possibilities for utilizing your
expectations to accomplish next level results.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN" style="color: #333333; font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 24pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;">For
addition insights and observations, I invite you to check out the following
posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/03/should-could-accomplish.html"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Should, Could, Accomplish</span></span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/03/thinking-small-for-big-results.html"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Thinking Small for Big
Results</span></span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin-top: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-53169480074149628832017-01-01T09:18:00.000-06:002017-01-01T09:26:57.116-06:00Resolutions Don't Work<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7oGudB2fE9OSN-YwWDr4O-EtBKF1qAoMDyd5sKc1gR4zuqhJ3HZirz1riAUZ5x8k9Rn4wv61qS7HaEADGwX6Kx4HZPvDQyHv8qnRjyJh_sGu56M6Jexv9AGhSogTTh9l6M1dfTJaClw/s1600/Brain+Connections+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7oGudB2fE9OSN-YwWDr4O-EtBKF1qAoMDyd5sKc1gR4zuqhJ3HZirz1riAUZ5x8k9Rn4wv61qS7HaEADGwX6Kx4HZPvDQyHv8qnRjyJh_sGu56M6Jexv9AGhSogTTh9l6M1dfTJaClw/s320/Brain+Connections+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">
<span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "calibri";"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">
<span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">by
Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">
<span style="margin: 0px;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Today is the day when many generate New Year’s resolutions
that are destined to fail. I track this every year at my local health club.
For the first two weeks of January, it’s unbelievably crowded. As the
month progresses, the crowds dissipate at an alarmingly (and comforting) rapid
rate. This tendency is repeated in a variety of personal and professional arenas as well intended New Year’s
Resolutions fall apart. Why, you may ask, does this situation repeatedly occur
at this time of year? Resolutions, although well intentioned, tend to be overly ambitious
aspirational goals rather than more realistic and pragmatic ones. They tend to focus more on
the idealized outcome than on the process of building sustainable outcomes. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I recommend a highly effective alternative to New Year's resolutions, a
process oriented alternative that facilitates the development
of habits that align with aspirational goals. This process is known as a </span><a href="http://www.ted.com/talks/matt_cutts_try_something_new_for_30_days"><span style="color: #0563c1; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">30-Day
Challenge</span></a><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. It takes approximately 30 days to develop a new habit,
30-days for your brain to rewire and shift your aspirational goal into your daily routine. Resolutions tend to be unrealistically grand, while
30-Day Challenges focus more on developing habits that support your aspirational
goals. Taking on a
30-Day Challenge around health and fitness recognizes that fitness is a process
that requires gradually improving your health and strength over time.</span><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">For example, if your goal is to improve your
fitness level in the current year and you’ve been habitually sedentary in the
prior year, your 30-day challenge might be to walk for 15-20 minutes every day
for 30 days. Staging your aspirational goal of health and fitness via a 30-Day
Challenge results in setting up a structure to increase the probability of
success, rather than the likelihood of failure.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The 30-Day Challenge structure utilizes the construct of
neuroplasticity to organically restructure your brain. It also facilitates the
building of positive self-esteem and appreciation for process. As you stage
your aspirational goals via a series of 30-Day Challenges, you will ultimately find
yourself accomplishing goals that may have seemed unobtainable in the past. What aspirational
goal could you choose to take on as a series of 30-Day Challenges this year? </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="line-height: 107%; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">For addition insights
and observations, I invite you to check out the following posts:</span></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/optimal-performance-fundamentals_25.html"><span lang="EN" style="color: blue; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Optimal Performance Fundamentals</span></span></a><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
</span></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<span style="margin: 0px;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/learn-something-new.html"><span style="color: blue; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Learn Something New</span></span></a></span><u><span style="color: blue; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></u></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0px 0px 11px;">
<a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20141118032626-2122288-small-adjustments-big-results?trk=mp-author-card"><span style="color: blue; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Small
Adjustments, Big Results</span></span></a></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-84279098709750398252016-07-31T22:42:00.000-05:002016-07-31T22:42:04.666-05:00Authenticity <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEnyQKQv4ujn1XGEYa3m-i-X0-Ked-cjVC-zR801EtmOt7aiClIS5IYBy5kE410iB8y2ZstNpqLnGI_dV7tFOBV7yg47nvn6gnjS3Y8IxFEaDy-ZJUrUTp2p0ApDxLha7uzo1zb4-YEg/s1600/Transformation+Tree+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="269" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEnyQKQv4ujn1XGEYa3m-i-X0-Ked-cjVC-zR801EtmOt7aiClIS5IYBy5kE410iB8y2ZstNpqLnGI_dV7tFOBV7yg47nvn6gnjS3Y8IxFEaDy-ZJUrUTp2p0ApDxLha7uzo1zb4-YEg/s320/Transformation+Tree+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><b>Authenticity</b></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";">
</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“Wanting to
be someone else is a waste of who you are.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~Kurt Cobain</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Each of us
comes into the world with a unique biology, set of skills and talents. Anyone who
has raised a child knows it’s all there right from the beginning. Under the age of
five, children tend to be spontaneous and genuine, moving through the world
with a natural sense of curiosity and self-expression. Young children tend to be fully present in the moment, expressing their emotions as they surface from an authentic inner space. You can always tell what
is going on inside of young children. If they are feeling happy, they exude delight.
If they are feeling curious, they are all about exploration and comprehension.
If they are angry, they erupt in the moment and then settle down. If they are
feeling loving and loved, they exhibit the pure expression of love, hugging a
person or even a tree. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">And then,
something happens. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Past the age of five
(or sometimes even sooner), natural expression goes underground. Or, as my son
so wisely observed many years ago: “the world gets to them.” External comparison and judgement moves
into their inner space and crowds out authenticity. Some of this is necessary
in order to build cultural and societal values and integrity, however, some of
this is about conforming to significant others’ beliefs about who they should
and need to be. The loss of authenticity is a double loss. It’s impossible to
fully develop and manifest your gifts in the world when these gifts are constantly
repressed. The psychic energy required for this type of repression results in a
loss of vitality and wellbeing. Additionally, your failure to be authentic
deprives the world of your unique skills, mindsets, vision, way of being in the
world and potential legacies. What one action step can you take today to express your authentic self?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "bradley hand itc"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For addition insights
and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/08/emerging.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "calibri";">Emerging</span></a></span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><u><span style="color: blue; font-family: "calibri";"> </span></u></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/12/kindness.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "calibri";">Kindness</span></a></span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/11/gratitude.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "calibri";">Gratitude</span></a></span></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-62897926954675650072016-07-30T16:15:00.000-05:002016-07-30T16:15:46.468-05:00Planting Seeds for the Future <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnHlECxXK8v3_NCr9evl5WBIAwALrh0MPArE7R7I1bmaUGGekUo01i4kbaT8K3o5i5_wY2WoNu3LRjuf19qz6RKB6cRPDOLpE7DQVfglqPPBPBKC74wLPRcNLNHH1HXTKTgOPcecyTvA/s1600/Incremental+Plant+Growth+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnHlECxXK8v3_NCr9evl5WBIAwALrh0MPArE7R7I1bmaUGGekUo01i4kbaT8K3o5i5_wY2WoNu3LRjuf19qz6RKB6cRPDOLpE7DQVfglqPPBPBKC74wLPRcNLNHH1HXTKTgOPcecyTvA/s320/Incremental+Plant+Growth+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><b>Planting
Seeds for the Future</b></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by
Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“Don’t judge
each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~ Robert
Louis Stevenson</span></div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Every action
that you take or conversation that you engage in has a ripple impact out into
the world, mostly in unanticipated ways. In fact, there is an area of study
concerning unanticipated consequences devoted to this phenomenon.
Although this study concentration is primarily focused on negative
consequences, I propose that it is equally likely for your actions and words to
set positive future consequences into motion. I find this likelihood to be both
comforting and filled with tremendous responsibility, as well as comprised of the need for self-awareness,
intention, trust, faith and patience. Let me explain……</span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">As a
psychologist, my work with individuals and organizations predominantly focuses
on articulating an aspirational vision and generating viable strategies, systems,
structures, skills and mindsets to reach this vision. As a graduate school
professor, my work focuses on imparting an optimal blend of theory, practice,
skills and mindsets. In all of my professional roles, I work from a place of
passion, dedication, knowledge and experience. With the wisdom that time and
experience provides, I have come to realize that I ultimately work from a place of
trust, faith and patience. I trust in the motivation, integrity and native
intelligence of my students and clients. I have faith that the seeds that I
plant will blossom with time, intention, action and experience and that what I
have to offer is “good enough” to facilitate this eventual blossoming. I have
patience, derived from the experience and belief that one’s unfolding ensues
over time. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Whether
you’re aware of it or not, you are continually planting seeds of wisdom, faith,
trust and inspiration in others, seeds that organically and miraculously take
root and grow in unexpected ways. What seeds will you plant today?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "bradley hand itc"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">For
additional insights and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/08/slow-time.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Slow Time</span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/08/emerging.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Emerging</span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/09/shifting-from-knowledge-to-wisdom.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Shifting From Knowledge to Wisdom</span></a></span><u><span style="color: blue; font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></u></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-79899900902469034452016-07-29T17:40:00.000-05:002016-07-29T17:40:47.597-05:00Starting Points <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBC3XbNi26JlOWKIXuBK2_pcGWHPn4ySFGx85P3RFQtk9wRK33-tVLc4RJTDKuMwENK6lyfrRnEOOAs46SUeNWUWHsbWXLooodGQrLzMbRTfLgQKTUPONCG-kIFPaR7kiogNSOXTrSfA/s1600/8%252920_10_StoneSpiralImage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBC3XbNi26JlOWKIXuBK2_pcGWHPn4ySFGx85P3RFQtk9wRK33-tVLc4RJTDKuMwENK6lyfrRnEOOAs46SUeNWUWHsbWXLooodGQrLzMbRTfLgQKTUPONCG-kIFPaR7kiogNSOXTrSfA/s320/8%252920_10_StoneSpiralImage.jpg" width="317" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Starting Points</span></b><span style="font-family: "calibri";"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“Your
present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine
where you start.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>~ Nido Qubein</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Choosing to
embody a starting point life perspective is strategic and empowering on
multiple levels.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Through this perspective, e</span>very moment presents an opportunity to embrace a new starting point and current circumstances
provide critical data for advancing toward your goals.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This
perspective, when intentionally embraced, provides the nourishment for
reflection, creativity and growth. As you intentionally shift your personal narrative regarding
loss, failure and opportunity, even a perceived failure can be viewed as a
starting point to a different way of being in the world. Starting points are the perfect time to reflect on the past, distinguish the status quo,
envision a satisfying future and identify the requisite skills and resources to
generate your desired future.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When
approached through a starting point mindset, these times are also
motivational and aspirational points, a time when the past informs but doesn’t
have to dictate the future. A starting point mindset reveals personal and situational
potential, inner and outer resources and facilitates shifting the impossible
into the possible. Where in your life would adopting a starting point
perspective generate opportunity and forward momentum?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "bradley hand itc"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">For addition insights
and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/learn-something-new.html"><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Learn Something New</span></span></a><u><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></u></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<u><span style="color: blue;"></span></u><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-other-side-breakdown-to.html"><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Breakdown to Breakthrough</span></span></a><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2015/08/doing-and-being.html"><span style="color: blue; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Doing and Being</span></span></a></span><b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-71200195086633064252016-07-28T09:06:00.000-05:002016-07-28T09:06:27.586-05:00Excellence and Habits<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVrutAvzaV2mS9J67aTU4WkrnwQ5MORaS0T4tKYprMOCIc26q4RMZnOJxcDpn2Kfvy8Kr19d_qvH6kDn-Unstj-EdpyA9SYWqiVMkqJgJh6SzRHaUwTjbub8sdkua5o3HK00W8YqmZGQ/s1600/Change+Wordle+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="196" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVrutAvzaV2mS9J67aTU4WkrnwQ5MORaS0T4tKYprMOCIc26q4RMZnOJxcDpn2Kfvy8Kr19d_qvH6kDn-Unstj-EdpyA9SYWqiVMkqJgJh6SzRHaUwTjbub8sdkua5o3HK00W8YqmZGQ/s320/Change+Wordle+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Excellence and Habits</span></b><span style="font-family: "calibri";"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“We are what
we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>~ Aristotle</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Excellence
requires an optimal combination of desire, motivation, commitment and action.
Most importantly, excellence requires repetition for a specified period of time
in order to shift a desire into a habit. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Brain research has shown that it takes
approximately thirty days of repetition for the brain to develop a new
neuropathway for a specific behavior; it takes even longer to dismantle
pathways once a habit is established. This reality helps explain why old habits
that no longer serve you take time to dissipate and eventually disappear. What
you can do to build positive habits is engage in specific repetitive behaviors that
lead to the development of neuropathways that align with your highest
values and vison. <a href="http://www.ted.com/talks/matt_cutts_try_something_new_for_30_days"><span style="color: #0563c1; font-family: "calibri";">Matt Cutts</span></a>,
in his brief TED Talk, “Try Something New for 30 Days,” provides excellent
details regarding the development of excellence through generating new habits.
I invite you to invest in yourself through watching Matt’s talk and committing
to a 30 day challenge. You have much to gain and nothing to lose,
except perhaps a way of being that no longer suits you.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "bradley hand itc"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For addition insights
and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/03/should-could-accomplish.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Should, Could, Accomplish</span></a></span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/03/thinking-small-for-big-results.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Thinking Small for Big Results</span></a></span></div>
<br />
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-76456253029670697672016-07-26T17:18:00.000-05:002016-07-26T17:18:04.581-05:00Problem Solving
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7v4S7gUYdiHOcgI0NZTnpGMmuwoRSkLwLCtfnkrN1ImKAES-FTJ5wDXNJvN048WenuHcifiORvqOFRUljY4C8BA5X_UTWDGeG0CgDRnOJdTB7gGe5R4QqO9hEBddxiSs7NfNpdegdqw/s1600/Brain+Connections+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7v4S7gUYdiHOcgI0NZTnpGMmuwoRSkLwLCtfnkrN1ImKAES-FTJ5wDXNJvN048WenuHcifiORvqOFRUljY4C8BA5X_UTWDGeG0CgDRnOJdTB7gGe5R4QqO9hEBddxiSs7NfNpdegdqw/s320/Brain+Connections+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Problem Solving</span></b><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“No problem
can be solved from the same consciousness that created it."<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>~ Albert Einstein</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Many people
think that the more effort you put into solving a problem, the faster you
will come up with a solution. Ironically, the exact opposite is true.
Sometimes, too much of the wrong type of effort serves to take you away from,
rather than toward, your solution. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Additionally,
taking this approach results in increased frustration and exhaustion. So, what’s
the solution to solving a problem when it’s clear that what you’re doing isn’t
working? The resolution begins via creating a transition space for a different type
of consciousness to emerge. Albert Einstein often facilitated this by taking a
nap when he reached a problem solving roadblock. Others do this by meditating,
taking a walk, listening to music, reading, cooking or engaging in anything that provides a space
between the old and not effective effort and the potential solution. The advantage
of stepping into this practice when you’re feeling stuck around generating a
solution is that you ultimately wind up working smarter instead of working harder.
Try it the next time you are faced with a challenging and seemingly unsolvable problem
and notice how different your experience is. Notice how creating a transition space
for a different level of consciousness to arise, elegantly leads to your
solution. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">For
additional insights, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-other-side-breakdown-to.html"><span style="color: blue;">Breakdown to Breakthrough</span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2015/08/doing-and-being.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Doing and Being</span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/08/forcing-vs-unfolding.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Forcing vs. Unfolding</span></a></span></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-66526178249363644792016-07-24T14:13:00.000-05:002016-07-24T14:13:49.731-05:00Hindsight vs. Kindness
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG98kZRhwrGQe7tPT0KyKM9ROPej0hkdfY-oGV2POIH5GHx_EGjjToLvaLTLFiYP9sxSYhoTFQlmpdoM82tcY9NL4HuKa2bXzP4aHhOrySMiD3DS-zUP4uciAHQ9dwgJaYsGQe1lig1w/s1600/Sun+Spiral+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="191" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG98kZRhwrGQe7tPT0KyKM9ROPej0hkdfY-oGV2POIH5GHx_EGjjToLvaLTLFiYP9sxSYhoTFQlmpdoM82tcY9NL4HuKa2bXzP4aHhOrySMiD3DS-zUP4uciAHQ9dwgJaYsGQe1lig1w/s200/Sun+Spiral+Image.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Hindsight vs. Kindness</span></b><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“View your
life with kindsight. Stop beating yourself up about things from your past.
Instead of slapping your forehead and asking, ‘What was I thinking,” breathe
and ask yourself the kinder question, “What was I learning?’”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>~ Karen Salmansohn</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Ruminating
about past actions appears to be a popular activity, one that frequently leads
to increased anxiety, negative self-judgement and diminished self-esteem.
Imagine how different your experience of yourself and your potential would be
if instead of beating yourself up, you developed the habit of evaluating the
past from an attitude of appreciation, kindness, curiosity and wisdom. You could view
your past through the filter of kindness, affection and appreciation for the person
that you were with the coping resources you possessed at that moment in time. You
would understand that if you could have done better at the time, you would
have. This approach does NOT let you off the hook for past actions; it serves
to allow you to accept your limitations at the time and take action to make amends
for your less than desirable actions. You can be curious regarding what you
were thinking at the time and generate alternative behaviors should you be
faced with a similar situation in the future. You can also visualize yourself
responding differently with the wisdom gleaned from your experience, mistakes
and intentional reparations. Taking on this mindset would directly facilitate
what Karen Salmansohn refers to as “kindsight.” This kinder approach is both
freeing and growth enhancing and has a positive ripple impact in your life and
out into the world.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">For
additional insights and observations, check out the following posts: </span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;"></span><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2015/12/forgiveness-and-freedom.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">Forgiveness
and Freedom</span></a><u><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span></span></u></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<u><span style="color: blue;"></span></u><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2015/12/simplicity-and-challenge-of-getting-to.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">Getting
to Essence</span></a><span style="font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/04/defining-moments.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">Defining
Moments</span></a> </div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-89356290356528379892016-07-23T19:24:00.002-05:002016-07-23T19:24:54.429-05:00Knowing When to Quit
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgvh2KT44lxHzSy1megizMnszvL_EQpriosNBzL_2Aw1yT7UDtxHcahkJB2Jf-_-AIJj24WoXIlVjCSpfodXOUIosiYk14tgxygKRDDkBITGJH-SNxr9GEHsealnCBwu0B4V2EfYDxNg/s1600/Positive+Change+Agent+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="192" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgvh2KT44lxHzSy1megizMnszvL_EQpriosNBzL_2Aw1yT7UDtxHcahkJB2Jf-_-AIJj24WoXIlVjCSpfodXOUIosiYk14tgxygKRDDkBITGJH-SNxr9GEHsealnCBwu0B4V2EfYDxNg/s320/Positive+Change+Agent+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Knowing When to Quit</span></b><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“Sometimes
walking away has nothing to do with weakness and everything to do with
strength. We walk away, not because we want others to realize our worth and
value, but because we finally realize our own.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>~ Robert Tew</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">If you came of age within the last 30-40 years, you most
likely were raised with some version of the philosophy: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">quitters never win and winners never quit</i>. Embodying this attitude
results in experiencing quitting as a sign of failure - an action reserved
for the weak, unskilled and unmotivated. You’ve probably even heard numerous
media stories regarding perseverance leading to success. These types of stories
take on an almost mystical quality, coupled with a dire warning regarding the
cost of quitting; what they fail to consider are the potential gains.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I propose that quitting is a highly underrated undertaking. There
are times in your life where the decision to quit is ultimately a highly
strategic and empowering choice, one that can lead to a myriad of potential
gains. These rewards directly result from self-awareness, inner strength and a
commitment to creating the life you want to live. Not quitting, when you know
that a situation, job or relationship is not working out, is generated out of fear
of change and the unknown and a lack of faith and trust in the world and yourself.
Removing yourself from a destructive situation provides essential space for new
opportunities and challenges more aligned with your passion, skills and values
to enter your life.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I am not advocating quitting each time the going gets rough
and you feel extremely challenged, depleted or tempted to withdraw from a
professional or personal setback. What I am recommending is that you utilize
these times to evaluate your options from an alternative perspective.
Specifically, when you are feeling drawn to quitting, consider whether doing so
is in service of your highest values and overall goals? If the answer is yes,
then the next step is to work out a viable strategic plan to do so; generate a
plan that honors you and empowers you to withdraw with integrity. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Quitting a toxic situation or one you have outgrown is an
act of courage, strength, wisdom and faith in yourself. Where in your life
might the choice to quit serve to move you forward toward a life more
aligned with your passion, skills and gifts?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="color: black;">Janet</span></span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For related post, check out the following links:</span></div>
<br />
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/10/courage-revisited.html"><span style="color: #002060; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Courage Revisited</span></span></a><br />
<br />
<div style="background: white; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/04/defining-moments.html"><span style="color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Defining Moments</span></span></a></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-35419577372652460842016-07-21T22:39:00.000-05:002016-07-21T22:39:49.705-05:00Revitalizing Relationships
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH7mqWz6VfTallVhXJrNJ4HJpLqsdhrH4BwkDfWGUM7TTgSd51CT-6-gbPCHpw0_5lHh-OstEgPcG2skXqDofBqFTwjzNdq8rdTRIkLmEr7_nP5rU7Tow0J8RLDry1uKfNkm2P93cgQA/s1600/Confetti.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="252" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH7mqWz6VfTallVhXJrNJ4HJpLqsdhrH4BwkDfWGUM7TTgSd51CT-6-gbPCHpw0_5lHh-OstEgPcG2skXqDofBqFTwjzNdq8rdTRIkLmEr7_nP5rU7Tow0J8RLDry1uKfNkm2P93cgQA/s320/Confetti.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><b>Revitalizing
Relationships</b></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“We come to
love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect
person perfectly.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~ Sam Keen</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">The key to building
successful long-term loving relationships is developing the habit of going back
to the beginning. Let me explain…... Loving relationships commence with the
phenomenon of limerence, commonly known as infatuation. This relationship stage
is accompanied by intense psychological and physiological symptoms. A significant
shift in your hormone levels occurs leading to both physical and psychological
attraction, along with feelings of being magnetically drawn to the other
person. This stage is also characterized by the idealization of the other
person; you tend to experience their words and actions as endearing. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">The
infatuation stage, however, is a temporary one that gradually fades over time. As
the fading occurs, many of the qualities that were initially appealing become irritating.
Although the qualities remain the same, your responses and meaning you attach
to the qualities changes. Many couples separate in the immediate post-limerence
time period. The real work of deepening a
relationship and developing a romantic friendship takes place as
infatuation ends. Couples who commit to moving beyond the infatuation stage
will experience the many benefits inherent in a long-term
relationship. What empowers them to deepen their relationship is choosing to develop the habit of returning to the
beginning. The process of returning to the beginning reminds you of your
partner’s initial appeal and attraction. Intentionally developing this habit also
serves to elicit your initial infatuation responses, along with the
strengthening of your ability to experience each other as imperfectly perfect.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For addition insights
and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/04/defining-moments.html"><span style="color: blue;">Defining Moments</span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2015/12/simplicity-and-challenge-of-getting-to.html"><span style="color: blue; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Getting to Essence</span></a></span></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-3441150712438337952016-07-19T06:49:00.000-05:002016-07-19T06:49:01.606-05:00Life Legacy from Dad
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcstDq2vmz9_ZwO8bh39v-tPbRfKuYRSwHH27O5pgJcxu4SEQwYI5ogAXH009rnMJ5fEVbGSsdcDbuOfjBXfwMjYLeNjoktEhAAepNVDM5Z7mIAejqH_9JfZYULTsxtWPlPpYZUoV_wQ/s1600/Sprouting+Bulbs+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcstDq2vmz9_ZwO8bh39v-tPbRfKuYRSwHH27O5pgJcxu4SEQwYI5ogAXH009rnMJ5fEVbGSsdcDbuOfjBXfwMjYLeNjoktEhAAepNVDM5Z7mIAejqH_9JfZYULTsxtWPlPpYZUoV_wQ/s320/Sprouting+Bulbs+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Life Legacy
from Dad</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“Enjoy the
little things in life because one day you’ll look back and realize they were
the big things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>~ Kurt Vonnegut</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Time is subjective. Sometimes it moves slowly and other times it appears to fly by. Today marks 12 years since my father’s passing. Sometimes
it feels as though he’s been gone forever and sometimes it feels as though just
yesterday we were having a conversation. Everyone who had the good fortune to
know Herbert Cyrus Goldman was enriched by his love, kindness and playful sense
of humor, which was sprinkled with his customary puns. They also had the
pleasure of reading his beloved poetry, filled with passion, joy and wisdom. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dad loved and was proud of his family; he was
dedicated to doing whatever was needed to support them, financially and
psychologically. He had a passion for learning and could always be found
reading a newspaper or book or listening to the news on the TV or radio.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">As a child,
we tend to have a limited understanding of our parents. We enter their
lives at a point where they are mostly formed into their adulthood, unaware
of the life events and experiences that contributed to the making of the adults
they had become. When I was in graduate school many years ago developing my
love for life-narrative, I had the good fortune to facilitate life-story
interviews with both of my parents. At first dad was reluctant to being
interview, but he quickly embraced the experience which took place over an
eight week period. As his life-narrative unfolded, I was able to experience him
as a young boy, teenager and man. I learned about his past experiences and context
of world events that shaped him. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Dad was an
ambitious and athletic youth, earning a city-wide tennis championship in high
school. He adored his sisters Millie and Sadie and always felt protective of
Sadie. Dad grew up in tough times financially. He worked hard academically and
graduated high school in three years so that he could help support his family. Dad
served in WWII and helped liberate a Nazi Concentration Camp; the images of
this assignment remained with him throughout his life. He had dreams of
becoming an attorney, which his daughter Natalie lived out for him. When he was
supporting his young family, he often moonlighted selling beer at White Sox
games. I remember him coming home from the games and telling stories about his
customers, making his work into a grand adventure. I know that I inherited my
work ethic and love of learning from Dad. My favorite stories that he told
during his life-narrative interviews were about his courting mom; they were young,
on a double date with other people, were strongly drawn to each other and wound
up dancing together all night. This was the beginning of a long and fruitful
marriage.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Although
he’s been gone for 12 years, dad’s love, legacy and wisdom will live on through
his three children and extended family for many years.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
</div>
</span><div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-65282482952096078162016-07-17T21:20:00.000-05:002016-07-17T21:20:50.577-05:00Present Moment Advantage<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEb5Ps83xOj13QroDNgk1jPyyFlqTO7gPP8tZ0-lC0_IXYaLUd9NmQ0BquZtVBrtHHbsNkpRSD_pnYbVNmzXiij5Qj9U9rlnfrBqO1VT4GQhFmqJnfRfw0RCPRsZt5_Ws8iyyQX1YYaA/s1600/Past-Present-Future+Clock.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEb5Ps83xOj13QroDNgk1jPyyFlqTO7gPP8tZ0-lC0_IXYaLUd9NmQ0BquZtVBrtHHbsNkpRSD_pnYbVNmzXiij5Qj9U9rlnfrBqO1VT4GQhFmqJnfRfw0RCPRsZt5_Ws8iyyQX1YYaA/s320/Past-Present-Future+Clock.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Present
Moment Advantage </span><span style="line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“If you are
depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in
the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.”</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~ Lao Tzu</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Living in the
present moment is a learned skill providing many advantages; it’s also an
ongoing process that serves to keep you connected with your most treasured
values and life goals. Living in the past keeps your emotions, thoughts and
mindsets from past occurrences alive in the present. This would be amazing if most
significant past experiences were positive ones. Unfortunately, when remembered
past occurrences are particularly traumatic or distressing, you’re essentially reinforcing
a life narrative that fails to serve you well in your present life. Similarly,
when you tend to focus on an imagined negative future, you generate fear-based
emotions and depressing life narratives that increase your anxiety and feelings
of hopelessness and decrease your sense of influence over your future. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since the future is unknowable, you are
sacrificing your present sense of well-being and resourcefulness for a feared unknowable
outcome. My dear friend Sue calls this phenomenon, “paying interest on the
future.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Present-based
living is an ongoing process, requiring intention, commitment and perseverance.
As it’s in your human nature to be periodically pulled into the past and anxious
about the future, how can you avoid this type of influence? The most critical
skill to strengthen as a means to diminish this natural force is self-awareness; begin
to observe, without self-judgement, when you are focused on a negative past narrative
or generating a depressing or anxiety producing future narrative. The mere act
of consistently noticing this pull will shift your energy around the past and
future, while gradually increasing the requisite internal resources to combat negative past-
and future-based narratives. Asking yourself what you can learn from the past
and what you want to create for the future will continue to shift your focus
and motivation. Although you can’t change the past – the facts are the facts –
you can intentionally learn from the past about what you do and don’t want to
bring forward, what you want to generate for your future and what you want to avoid
or eliminate in your life. You can utilize your answers from these types of
questions to envision a desirable future and generate action steps and strategies
in the present that organically lead to your future vision.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">For
additional insights and strategies, check out the following links:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/03/thinking-small-for-big-results.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Thinking
Small for Big Results</span></a> </span></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"></span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/are-your-smart-goals-smart-enough.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Are
Your SMART Goals Smart Enough?</span></a> </span></div>
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2011/11/reality-tv-wisdom.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Reality
TV Wisdom</span></a></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br /></span></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-4609086313429171672016-07-16T14:34:00.003-05:002016-07-16T14:34:33.185-05:00Everything Matters <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkPXabWtrz2cv65MsWNXiEsXxztS6F2uDOe3QoUfMzFIAuiwHLJYT0spdVF59QtMX6lcPc1aXw6Pl-D3b3Fs9maYSbsBKe21LSDtmuBaOKQHYIEf1yYzCmz789H4dStDZ6qigEhjyogQ/s1600/8_9_10_FractalPatternImage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="221" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkPXabWtrz2cv65MsWNXiEsXxztS6F2uDOe3QoUfMzFIAuiwHLJYT0spdVF59QtMX6lcPc1aXw6Pl-D3b3Fs9maYSbsBKe21LSDtmuBaOKQHYIEf1yYzCmz789H4dStDZ6qigEhjyogQ/s320/8_9_10_FractalPatternImage.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><b>Everything
Matters</b> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“Live your
life as though every act were to become a universal law.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~ Henry
David Thoreau</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Everything
that you do and say impacts your world with unanticipated and unexpected effects.
A random comment or observation spontaneously uttered in even the most casual
encounter could be the exact words that the other person needed to hear and you
needed to say at that precise moment in time. Or, your words, uttered quite
innocently could be offensive or destructive. Everything matters. As you intentionally
foster the habit of paying attention to your interactions and actions, you will
begin to notice the impact of your words and actions; your self- and
other-awareness will expand exponentially. Truly knowing and experiencing that
everything matters is simultaneously miraculous and unnerving in terms of personal
responsibility. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Imagine what
might be possible if you chose to shift your thinking to align with the Thoreau
quote at the beginning of this post? Taking on Thoreau’s philosophy would
result in the consistent employment of words and actions that align with your most
cherished values? Consider the ripple impact of this way of being in the world,
as well as the potential for positive change. Your words, actions and thoughts
matter greatly to yourself and others.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">I invite you
to consider the insights and observations from the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/10/courage-revisited.html"><span lang="EN" style="mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Courage
Revisited</span></span></a></span><span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"></span><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/04/defining-moments.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Defining
Moments</span></a><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2015/12/questions-and-answers.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Questions
and Answers</span></a></span><br />
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-12079931926006575292016-07-15T14:22:00.000-05:002016-07-15T14:22:51.420-05:00Paradox of Change <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6QDxRdBKLYFmO650IT7k1AdK69BJbKdxbpWYZCgzOZz1Rax_k9ksZBCvYzI-TXFLnuUwlskQvS_G9U5nXuU_ZRve3oGnPFI9ezCuo5HQqktQD9eFAWRN-KeWVMcyRl38Yojqq1KlGOA/s1600/Change+Wordle+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="245" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6QDxRdBKLYFmO650IT7k1AdK69BJbKdxbpWYZCgzOZz1Rax_k9ksZBCvYzI-TXFLnuUwlskQvS_G9U5nXuU_ZRve3oGnPFI9ezCuo5HQqktQD9eFAWRN-KeWVMcyRl38Yojqq1KlGOA/s400/Change+Wordle+Image.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><b>Paradox of
Change</b> </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“The secret
of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on
building the new.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~ Socrates </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Change Process</span></b></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Change is
the only constant in life. Everyone has their characteristic pattern of working
with change – some actively embrace and seek out change and some tend to deny or resist
change in an attempt to maintain the status quo. I tend to have an ambivalent relationship
with change; although I inevitably appreciate the results on the other side of
change, the journey itself can be quite challenging. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Change can
be internally or externally generated in most any life arena. Even when you choose to make a change in your life – work,
relationships, residence, etc. – the process is often surprisingly challenging.
Internally generated change can include taking on a new role, relationship,
status, skill or mindset. Externally generated change, also known as "stuff happens," is generated from someone or
something outside of yourself.</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Change Elements</span></b></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Change
incorporates elements of the past, present and future. Though your past might
not have been ideal, it was all that you knew at the time. Once the change process
is set in motion, your initial experience is that of living between worlds.
Your old world or way of being in the world no longer works and you are not yet
ensconced in the new. This space between the past and the future often feels
disorienting, illogical, unnatural, surreal and highly uncomfortable. The good
news is that this transition space is a temporary one. Although you might feel
stuck and unmotivated, a lot is happening internally to prepare you for your
new reality on the other side of change.</span></span><div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">When you’re
in the between place inherent in the change process , seeking out and engaging support
from friends, family and trusted others will significantly ease your journey to
the other side of the change. Through your intention, actions and faith in
getting through the challenge of change, you can create a bridge from the old
to the new via taking actions that move you forward. When you're able to
mobilize your trust to take the next step, subsequent next steps tend to
miraculously unfold. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Although moving
through change can feel a bit daunting at times, it’s definitely worth the
effort. What is your characteristic approach to change?</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">For addition insights
and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/learn-something-new.html"><span style="color: blue;">Learn
Something New</span></a><u><span style="color: blue;"> </span></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/12/embracing-good-enough.html"><span style="color: blue;">Embracing
"Good Enough"</span></a></span><br />
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2015/08/doing-and-being.html"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Doing and Being</span></a><br />
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-73047467665665386232016-07-13T11:11:00.000-05:002016-07-13T11:11:35.364-05:00Choose to Forgive
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<span style="line-height: 107%;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxoErBh3pcep8r7atHOmgX0dDRUGOXkQK_jWQS_28PTgS8uwXreW201pPC4aBvjYjODM170Ke4ifNKiXSy196Az6X2o8UCbU4LzK8LGnn3AS8THcX2Rodu57e_kGXowM-lTHkGYXiutg/s1600/Butterfly+Release+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="195" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxoErBh3pcep8r7atHOmgX0dDRUGOXkQK_jWQS_28PTgS8uwXreW201pPC4aBvjYjODM170Ke4ifNKiXSy196Az6X2o8UCbU4LzK8LGnn3AS8THcX2Rodu57e_kGXowM-lTHkGYXiutg/s320/Butterfly+Release+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Choose to Forgive</span></div>
</span><div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">“Forgiveness
is the attribute of the strong.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">~ Gandhi</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">Forgiveness
is a highly challenging and emotional undertaking. It’s so easy to forget that the
act of forgiveness is both a choice and a gift that you give to yourself. Each
time you choose to forgive, this choice releases you from a past hurt,
injustice or trauma. The act of forgiveness requires letting go of something – fairness,
disappointment, rage, sadness, perspective, desire, expectation, vision and/or
hope. Forgiveness requires moving beyond what should have been to a place of
accepting what is. This does not in any way propose that you should agree with,
condone, take responsibility for or like the situation that calls for your
forgiveness; objectively, contemptable things happen in this world that are out
of your causality, control and understanding.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">What you may
not be aware of is that forgiveness is ultimately about choosing to be happy;
it’s also about choosing to take back your personal power. The biggest
misconception regarding forgiveness is that it’s a one-time endeavor, that you simply
forgive and the offending injustice is over. Quite the contrary. Forgiveness is
an ongoing process. You consciously choose to engage in forgiveness whenever
the emotional charge of a past hurt, trauma or injustice invades your present
world. As you intentionally choose to forgive the past, you can utilize your precious
life force to move forward and build a gratifying future. Forgiveness is ultimately about freedom, focusing
on what truly matters and stepping into the power of courage and strength. </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 107%;">Forgiveness is about choosing to be happy over being right. Which one will
you choose?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 22.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For addition insights
and observations, I invite you to check out the following posts:</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/01/optimal-performance-fundamentals_25.html" target="_blank"><span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">Optimal Performance Fundamentals</span></a></span><span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/10/courage-revisited.html" target="_blank"><span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">Courage Revisited</span></a></span><span lang="EN" style="color: #4d4f51; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2014/04/defining-moments.html" target="_blank"><span lang="EN" style="color: #0077b5; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">Defining Moments</span></a></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
</div>
</span><div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-8516353253650050942016-07-11T21:09:00.000-05:002016-07-11T21:09:32.664-05:00The Calmness Advantage<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUbv2ExxzhKjEUWXhipEaGfXc7Nyfp_8e992P6rHzxOA5tJZUwcfUTABnanzS0PkEE0Ik3duqZegxYCDZ43bQNBZr0c2GdIviCnSFJIa5-Xmea2Mev0Xj4saQhcVfa6cclUAG8pr-O7g/s1600/8_17_10_WaterRippleImage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUsxONma_6qKm_wWtMFAiXKHzjAlL6VI9BF-Iz7irZvJ7nJnVPwDH-WQm2FcTPM41JXzLvbKoRYOhqxLlG_d03kYYUMxymCmHu4VwVagt_-MXARDjUKGiwpogeiC-_MU_Gb213OdAsUQ/s1600/Stone.Leaf.Sand+Image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="170" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUsxONma_6qKm_wWtMFAiXKHzjAlL6VI9BF-Iz7irZvJ7nJnVPwDH-WQm2FcTPM41JXzLvbKoRYOhqxLlG_d03kYYUMxymCmHu4VwVagt_-MXARDjUKGiwpogeiC-_MU_Gb213OdAsUQ/s320/Stone.Leaf.Sand+Image.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">The Calmness
Advantage</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“Nothing
gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and
unruffled under all circumstances.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~ Thomas Jefferson</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Have you
ever found yourself in a stressful situation and said or done something that
you later regretted? If your answer is yes, you’re not alone. One of the most challenging
skills to develop is the ability to stay calm and centered when it seems as
though everything around you is chaotic and/or falling apart. I propose that calmness
under pressure is a skill worth cultivating for a variety of reasons. It brings
people together and leads to win-win outcomes. Additionally, a critical incentive
for learning this skill is avoiding having to deal with regret for actions or
words originating from a reactive place. Staying calm under pressure provides
you with the time and space to observe and evaluate a situation from a neutral perspective.
You have the opportunity, even if it’s just for a few seconds, to determine the
needed response to deactivate a volatile situation and get back on track for a
desired and mutually satisfying outcome. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Several straightforward
questions, when asked from a place of calmness, curiosity and respect, are effective
in preventing a tense situation from escalating. These types of questions include:
“What is this really about? What do we want build here? What are we both committed
to accomplishing? Is there something we can agree on? Can we agree to disagree?”
Staying calm under pressure comes with a caveat. Sometimes, your calmness will
be misinterpreted as not caring or being condescending. If this occurs, you can
move from questions to “I’ statements before a question. For example: “I’m
committed to our understanding each other.” or “I think that we ultimately want
the same thing.” </span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
</div>
</span><div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Calmness
under pressure is a skill worth cultivating. It brings people together and leads
to win-win outcomes. What one action step can you take today to learn this
skill?</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">For
additional insights and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/07/agendas-yours-mine-and-ours-day-13.html"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Agendas - Yours, Mine and Ours</span></span></a></div>
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/08/forcing-vs-unfolding.html"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Forcing vs. Unfolding</span></span></a><br />
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58853890063346821.post-83467779708891729402016-07-10T22:08:00.002-05:002016-07-10T22:08:59.493-05:00Perspective<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFD26Sadq8TMZ0i4gZcrFfaqN5p5vTyukxAlgJwozFxKmX4m8jWctYBX7w8eoC3BLlME0MZPahK5yFWNiQsdAYpNEC3nnK-1X9p6m7D3I9o96llNlgvA2ePESkM0xe8mEjm4GyPnxIPA/s1600/8_9_10_StarburstLeadershipImage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFD26Sadq8TMZ0i4gZcrFfaqN5p5vTyukxAlgJwozFxKmX4m8jWctYBX7w8eoC3BLlME0MZPahK5yFWNiQsdAYpNEC3nnK-1X9p6m7D3I9o96llNlgvA2ePESkM0xe8mEjm4GyPnxIPA/s320/8_9_10_StarburstLeadershipImage.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Perspective</span><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">by Janet
Shlaes, Ph.D.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">“The voyage
of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">~ Marcel
Proust</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Most data is
neutral and yet your rarely experience the facts of your life impersonally. Your
perspective directly impacts the meaning you attribute to life events and
interactions and your feelings elicited by them. A change in perspective won’t
change the facts, however, it can change your relationship over time to the
facts. Some attribute this shift in meaning to maturity, wisdom or even divine
intervention. I attribute the shift to an expansion in your field of meaning. A
powerful exercise that I often utilize with clients is derived from the fields
of Positive Psychology and Narrative Therapy; it incorporates taking on several
perspectives around a challenging interpersonal life event. Think about a
challenging experience or interaction; it might be a lifecycle event, a random
encounter or a disagreement with someone you are close to. Narrate the
experience from multiple perspectives – from each participant’s point of view
and from the point of view of a neutral observer. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What people usually find is that through the
telling of the narrative from multiple perspectives, their meaning and
emotional attachment to the experience shifts over time. The facts are still
the facts, but a shift in perspective results in a gradual shift in meaning and
emotional impact.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Bradley Hand ITC"; font-size: 20.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Janet</span></b></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">For addition insights
and observations, check out the following posts:</span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/06/if-youre-asking-question-day-5.html"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">If
You're Asking the Question</span></span></a></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/12/making-difference.html"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Making a Difference</span></span></a></div>
<a href="http://transformationalcommunication.blogspot.com/2013/10/courage-revisited.html"><span lang="EN" style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">Courage Revisited</span></span></a><br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10707003414950748074noreply@blogger.com0